ATLAS F1 - THE JOURNAL OF FORMULA ONE MOTORSPORT
The Fuel Stop
Investigative Journalism at its Best

By Reginald Kincaid, England
Atlas F1 Correspondent


Pierre Dupasquier Invades Italy

Dupasquier painted shortly before charging towards MaranelloClermont Ferrand, France. The Michelin Corporation announced today that it had stopped all negotiations with Ferrari and FIA and under the leadership of Pierre Dupasquier invaded the republic of Italy.

The target of the invasion will be to hunt down Ferrari technical director Ross Brawn and the editors of Gazzetta dello Sport.

"All we can say at this moment is that our army has crossed the Italian border in a convoy of Williams FW25s," said a spokesman for the French tyre company, adding: "We expect arrests and apologies at any moment now."

The Michelin spokesman declined however to comment on reports that the army was unable to squeeze through Italian tollgates due to unusually wide tires.

 
 
The Hungarian Grand Prix Photo Review


"Fisichella's 2004 challenger"

In spite of niggling issues with the calibration of their new wind tunnel, Sauber are still convinced that when properly tweaked their 2004 car, pictured here behind Giancarlo Fisichella, can provide their newly signed star with considerable luggage space.


"I am going to catch myself a World Championship"

With the World Championship title a realistic possibility, Williams driver Juan Pablo Montoya has replaced his famous fast-food diet with hefty portions of carrots.

 
SIDEBAR



Cosworth
Hire pyrotechnics experts


Townsend Bell
Yet another rookie impresses in straightline testing


Sir Terry Rowduck
"Stirling or Surtees would beat the pants off today's puppy drivers, if only they would fit into the cars."


Tyre Compound Mixing
Voted sexiest profession by Cosmopolitan magazine

 
 
 
"Bernie" to Handle All Future Contract Negotiations Regarding the Montreal Grand Prix


F1 supremo Bernie Ecclestone introduces "Bernie" to the press

London, England. Formula One supremo Bernie Ecclestone announced today that all future contract negotiations regarding the Montreal Grand Prix would be handled by a bust statue called "Bernie", molded in the tycoon's image.

"This statue, which bears a striking resemblance to me, will listen carefully to the Canadians' arguments for keeping a race without tobacco sponsorship on the calendar," said Ecclestone, "and I am sure that if 'Bernie' gives them a positive answer, I will too."

Made entirely out of iron and lead, the 300kg "Bernie" bust statue is predicted to maintain a strong position against any of the Canadian delegation's convincing arguments and protect the interest of Mr and Mrs Ecclestone.

  FIA Declares Formula One Racing for Diplomats Only

San Marino Ambassador holds convincing lead

Paris, France. Formula One's governing body, the FIA, announced today that only diplomats and their spouses would be eligible from now on to drive in the Formula One World Championship racing series.

"We felt it was necessary in our efforts to increase the standard of racing to introduce this new regulation," said FIA president Max Mosley. "A modern racing driver needs to do so much more than race cars and we felt that without adequate training in socializing and lobbying he really wouldn't stand a chance."

After yesterday's changes, the right honorable ambassador of San Marino Michael Schumacher took a convincing lead in the championship with 72 points - some 72 points ahead of the next ambassador.


About the author:
Reginald Kincaid was born on 30th November 1912. Following graduation from the Royal Military College in Sandhurst he was commissioned in the Forth Hussars in February 1931. While stationed in Egypt with his brigade in 1934, he led the famous "Elgar" high speed camel expeditions that explored and documented the vast sand seas of Libya. In his own words he soon after became addicted to the "fine art of travelling fast" but exchanged camels for cars. Kincaid's exploits in European motor racing became legendary after being documented in his best selling biography "Racing with a stiff upper lip". Reginald Kincaid retired in 1991 and has been covering motor racing ever since. He now lives in Surrey, England, and tends to his hobby of beekeeping.


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Volume 9, Issue 37
September 10th 2003

Atlas F1 Exclusive

Interview with Sam Michael
by David Cameron

Fisichella: Through the Visor
by Giancarlo Fisichella

Season in the Sun
by David Cameron

GP Preview

2003 Italian GP Preview
by Craig Scarborough

Italy Facts & Stats
by Marcel Schot

Columns

The Fuel Stop
by Reginald Kincaid

Rear View Mirror
by Don Capps

Bookworm Critique
by Mark Glendenning

On the Road
by Garry Martin

Elsewhere in Racing
by David Wright & Mark Alan Jones

The Weekly Grapevine
by Tom Keeble


  Contact the Author
Contact the Editor



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